Jobless and Powerless
by XxxDeathStarxxX
Summary: the aliens are stuck on earth with no powers! They soon relies they need money, and to get money they need jobs... Chapter 4 up!
1. No Powers

Jobless and Powerless

By: Kishu-san

Kishu-san: Hi everyone! Yes another fanfic, I know I'm crazy. I know your all going to be like, update one of your other fics! Yes I know I still have to keep writing for 'The Love for My Mate,' 'Love Sick,' and I don't even remember when I updated 'When Their Worlds Coiled'.

Ichigo: Why don't you update them then?

Kishu-san: Cause this will be funny! By the way I don't encourage gambling.

Ichigo: What?

Kishu-san: I know random, but whatever.

Ichigo: And I suppose your going to make me make out with Kish right?

Kishu-san: I don't think so. I don't even think you're in this fic that much. Amazing I know, that this **isn't** a KishXIchigo fic. Not really a romance at all, but hey, I can always change my mind.

* * *

An odd group of half-animal and elfish looking people were in the usually quite park. "Just forget it konecko-chan, there's no way you'll win!" yelled a green haired boy floating above the half-animals. A cat girl dressed in a puffy pink (Kishu-san: Gag! Sorry I hate pink.) outfit looked up at the boy angrily, "What are you talking about Kish? We all ready beat the Kirena Anima! How do you suppose you'll win now?" "Ha! You will see- uff!" said Kish as he and two others fell to the ground.

"What happened?" said the winny voice of Tart. Kish sat up to see his two companions on the ground. They were sitting up just as shocked as him. What _had_ happened?

The mew started to laugh. "Why are we on the ground?" asked Pie confused. "Ha ha, you guys don't even know how to work your powers! How do you expect to take over earth?" said Mew Ichigo. Kish stood up angrily, "Take _back_ earth! Not take over! We were here first!" Ichigo rolled her eyes; "Well you left. I'm sorry about your people and all, but I have to worry about my own race first."

The two other aliens stood up and looked at the Mews with hatred. "Lets go girls. Our work here is done!" said Mew Zakuro seeing that all she was getting was death glares. They all nodded and with on leap they were all gone.

Kish wanted to kick himself for losing his temper. If he hadn't maybe Ichigo would have stayed longer. "Let's get out of here guys." Said Kish still looking longingly at the place Ichigo had been moments before.

"Ah… great idea, but none of our powers are working." Said Pie. Kish turned around shocked, "How could this be happening! Are you saying we're stuck on earth without powers, with tons of humans every where!?!" "Yup, that's pretty much what he said." Tart said in a smart-ass way.

"Great! Now what the fuck are we going to do?" Kish said sarcastically. Pie put his hand to his chin pondering. "I guess we should look for shelter since it's getting dark." Kish seriously felt like crap. Could this day get any worse?

The tree aliens walked out of the park and started to wonder the city. It was dark so not that many people noticed their odd appearance. The ones that did laughed and would say something like, "Good cosplay costumes guys!"

After hearing this a few times tart asked, "What's a cosplay Pie?" Pie just shrugged his shoulders. They eventually would up in front of a bar. Yes, I said bar. This bar happened to be called "Joey's Bar".

"What's a bar?" Tart asked. "A place were human serve drinks and stuff." "Well I'm thirsty! So I'm going in!" Tart said running off before Pie or Kish could get him. "This'll be fun! I hop he gets drunk!" said Kish. Then Kish and Pie walked into the bar after Tart. Little did they know that this bar wasn't _just_ a bar. It was gay bar, for gay people.

* * *

Kishu-san: I know kind of short but it was so that I could make you think! All I can tell you is its going to include Tart and a pickle and Kish is going to be wearing really think square sun glasses. You'll see what I mean by jobless later. 


	2. Gay Bars

Kishu-san: I cant believe it! I totally screwed up on this chapter and none of you noticed! Some readers you are! This is called Jobless and **Powerless. **For you people who have no idea what im talking about, just read the chap and forget about it, kay?

* * *

Last time: After hearing this a few times Tart asked, "What's a cosplay Pie?" Pie just shrugged his shoulders. They eventually would up in front of a bar. Yes, I said bar. This bar happened to be called "Joey's Bar".

"What's a bar?" Tart asked. "A place were human serve drinks and stuff." "Well I'm thirsty! So I'm going in!" Tart said running off before Pie or Kish could get him. "This'll be fun! I hope he gets drunk!" said Kish. Then Kish and Pie walked into the bar after Tart. Little did they know that this bar wasn't _just_ a bar. It was gay bar, for gay people.

As the door open a ton of men turned their eyes to see Kish and Pie. Kish and Pie both had very determined looks on their faces. Kish was doing a power pose with his arms on his sides. Pie had his hands clenched into a fist in anger of his younger companion's stupidity.

* * *

All the men seemed shocked at the two boys who had almost banged the door down, in rather revealing outfits…

Many of the men eyed the two with interest, especially Kish. The two see Tart at the counter starting to take a sip of beer. Kish runs over and rips the glass out of his hands. "Tart, you baka! You can't drink that stuff! It's not good for you, especially someone your age."

Tart pouted and crossed his arms. "But I'm **thirsty**! And you said they served drinks here…" he whined. "Alcohol. Tarto shouldn't drink it." Pie confirmed. Tart continued to grumble. Kish shook his head and sighed. "Let's get out of here."

* * *

Just as the three were about to exit one of the guys came up to Kish and tapped his shoulder. Kish raised his eyebrow at the man. "Would you like me to buy you a drink cutie?" he asked seductively. "Wha-?" Kish didn't seem to understand.

Many other men started to crowd around them. All the men were asking for one (or all) of the aliens if they could buy them a drink, what their telephone number was, if they could maybe get a hotel room together, and one asked what brand of underwear they had on. The last one freaked Kish out and he was **not **about to say he didn't have any on…

The three were now back to back. "Pie, what the hell is going on!?!" Kish exclaimed. "I'm not sure!" He screamed to Kish above the many men's voices. "Wait! Look over there!" Tart pointed to a sign near the counter. "Joey's GAY bar!?!" Kish read.

* * *

The bar tender looked up. "Oh, yeah! I keep forgetting to fix the sign outside. Would one of you guys want a drink?" he said the last part in a suggestive way.

"Oh my fucking lord!" Kish screeched quietly between his teeth. And before you know it Kish started to feel someone pulling at his shirt. He then looked down to see he wasn't wearing a shirt anymore.

Kish's eyes grew big and he looked over to see Pie and Tart in similar situations. The men were starting to grab at his pants now. "Woah! Hold on everyone! We are straight, got that? We just came in here because are younger friend here is an idiot. Now can I please have my shirt back!" Kish yelled to the crowd of horny men.

They all stopped for a moment thinking, but then one of them started to laugh. The other men seemed to get the 'joke' too and started to smile laugh too. One guy spoke, "Ha ha, yeah right! You don't need to be scared honey, we'll take care of you." Kish got very beat red, his eyes burning with anger, what was wrong with this sick world!?!

Then the pulling and ripping of clothes continued. Kish was now on floor. 'Life sucks!' he thought. Being trained for battle, his reflexes took over at the fact of being pinned down and kicked a bunch of the men off of him. 'It seems I at least am stronger then a human!'

"Whoa, babyyou work out?" asked one of the men. 'Someone kill me...' Kish thought The guys were starting to crowd around him again. Doing the only thing Kish could think of (yes he does that!), he started to battle his way past the gays to Tart.

"Kish! Your alive! Save me! I'm drowning in a sea of gays!" The leittle alien pleaded. And before you know it, Kish picked him up and was using him as a sword/shield to battle his way to Pie who's pants had been tour to the knee.

"Hiya!" kish yelled doing some weird nija move he saw in one of Tart's videogames to beat a boss, except Tart was the weapon and a big fat guy was the boss.

"Let's run for it!" Pie yelled. And they battled their way to the door. As soon as they got out they started to run like there was no tommorow.

"We never speak of this." Pie says. "Oh, yeah." "I hear you there." The two nodded in agreement.

* * *

Meanwhile, back at the bar…

All the horny gays looked rather depressed that their catch of the day, so to speak, had gotten away. The guy who pulled Kish's shirt off held said object up in the air. "At least I still have his shirt!" he says happily. The many other men wanting the shirt then tackle him in a sea of gayness.

* * *

Kishu-san: Yeah… short again. But this isn't one of my mager stories so deal with it.


	3. Dark Allies

Jobless and Powerless

By: XxxDeathStarxxX

* * *

It was probably past midnight now. The aliens shirtless and what remained of their pants were rags shivered in the dark night.

Kish was hugging himself trying to preserve the heat still remaining in his body. "Ha, now _this's_ sad. This planets being destroyed from _**global warming**_ and were going to freeze to death on it! I don't get it, its usually colder then this on our planet…" Kish said in a fake joking way.

"It's because- we've become use to the earth's climate. All animals adept to there enviro-" Pie started to explain, shivering. "This's no time to be scientific Pie. Right Tart?" Kish got no reply. He turned to his youngest companion. He was dragging himself to keep up with the two older aliens.

Kish stopped to wait up for him. When tart finally got to Kish he started to lean on him for heat. His eyes were closed and he looked more pale then usual. "So cold…" he said pitifully.

"You don't look so good little buddy." Kish said crouching down to Tart's level. The little alien wrapped his arms around the older seeking warmth. The older boy took hold of the younger one's legs and picked him up as the younger held onto his neck.

Kish quickened his pace to keep up with Pie. When he did he stayed close. "Pie how long can we keep this up? I'm not sure Tarts gona make it." Kish said worriedly. "What state is he in now?" Pie asked trying to keep his cool, and boy he was.

"He's asleep. But we need to find some where warm. Or at least _warmer_." He replied. Pie looked around in desperation. He saw an ally and looked down it. He saw a 'Good Will' box and some garbage cans. "That's it!" he said thinking out loud.

"What is it Pie?" Kish asked wondering what would give the usual monotone alien such energy in his voice. "Humans- they put unwanted close and blankets and what not to give to a store for needy people." He ran to it and pulled up the lid and grabbed a black plastic garbage bag.

Pie tore the thin plastic to bits and pulled out some clothes. For himself he got some old jeans and a white long sleeved shirt that said, "I heart manga," in red lettering.

Kish laid Tart down on the ground and picked trough the pile. He picked some black casual trousers, a sleeveless red shirt, and he couldn't help but take a pair of sunglasses he had found.

"Auh, we'll turn around and change." Pie suggested red in the face. They changed hurriedly in case any one came down the ally.

Kish took the wrappings out of his hair trying to cover his sizeable ears and put the sunglasses on top of his head. He felt much warmer after putting the clothes on. "Are you decent?" he asked Pie not wanting to be scared for the rest of his life. Even if he was questioning how long that was going to be…

"Yes." The older male answered. Pie turned to see that Pie had also taken his wrappings out, the shirt was kind of tight so you could really see what was underneath, witch Pie usually tried to hide with baggy shirts. _'Girls would flock to him if only he wasn't such a dork all the time. "I love manga," yea, he still a dork.' _Thought Kish.

"Now to find something for poor Tarto." Pie stated looking at the sad form that Tart had been decreased to. "How 'bout this?" Kish asked picking the first he found on top of the pile. "I don't see what's wrong with it. You can change him." Pie said turning around.

"Why you!! I will get you for this Pie, I swear!" Kish ranted. "I know, you have a horribly dirty mouth Kishu." "Har-har Pie, enough with the sarcasm!" Kish looked down at Tart and started to pull of his pants slowly. "I am not gay, I am not gay. I am _**so**_ not gay!" he chanted.

Kish had his eyes closed as long as he could. But the time came when he finally had to open them…

"OH MY GOD!! PIE I'M GOING TO KILL YOU!" Kish bellowed. Finally when Kish was done, he checked his work. Tart was in a beautiful, rose covered dress with lace, and puffy arm parts.

Kish raised an eyebrow. "For some reason I don't think this is right…" "Would you rather take it off again?" "HELL NO!" Kish responded. Pie examined the still sleeping Tart. "Why, he looks… pretty."

"Ha, it ain't so pretty underneath!" Kish said plainly. "I wouldn't know." said Pie. Kish started to fume.

"What now?" Kish asked tiredly. "Sleep, we'll get a fresh start in the morning." "And we're sleeping where…?" "The ground, and we should probably stay near each other to preserve heat…" he said as modestly as he could. "You've got to be kid-" "Kish do you want to freeze or not!?" the older boy said sternly. Kish sighed, "No." "Then lie down on the ground! God that sounded wrong…"

Kish obeyed, though unenthusiastic about it. He got some of the remaining clothes to use as a pillow and pulled Tart close to him. Kish stiffened as he felt Pie lie down behind him. "This's so gay!" he mumbled.

Eventually exhaustion kicked in and all the aliens were sound to sleep. Well, as sound as three aliens who just got striped of their powers, clothes, and in Kish's case dignity, could sleep.

* * *

DeathStar: Poor, poor aliens! Review for their sake or they will be stuck in a dark scary ally having to sleep next to each other. REVIEW!


	4. Fan Girls

**Jobless and Powerless**

**Chapter Four: Fan Girls**

**By: XxxDeathStarxxX

* * *

**

Kish woke to feel someone poking him. He looked up to see a large group of girls staring down at him. He stood up immediately. "It's not what you think! I'm straight! I just needed to sleep next to these idiots or I would of froze to death, honest. I me-" "We understand, Kishu-sama. We are here to help you." The one if front with wavy orange-y hair said.

He fell to his knees with shock. "Thank you! You are all angels from the purest of souls." Kish all but started crying. The group of about six girls all blushed. "Your happiness is a great enough thanks Kishu-sama." A short haired blue one said bowing to him. Then they all gave him a slight bow. "Come with us…" The one Kish presumed was their leader, the orange haired one let out her hand to him.

OooOooOooOooOooOooOooO

A few hours latter Kish found himself sitting on top of a king sized mattress in a rather good sized apartment. Pie and Tart were still asleep. Before Kish could do a thing the girls had lifted both Pie and Tart and had told him that he should follow them.

Three of the girls sat on the bed watching him, two were in the kitchen, and the last one had gone out to get the three aliens some more 'proper clothing'.

"So… how do you girls know who I am, and if you do why are you being nice to me?" Kish asked not liking how the girls stared at him _silently_.

"One day Kishu-sama was attacking in the park and we saw him. All six of us thought of the same thing, 'He's so awesome there should be a club about him!' and then we did! We all became friends and rented out this big apartment together, and it is all because of Kishu-sama!" A girl with a high purple ponytail, Olivia, said admiringly.

Kish bit his lip kind of nervous. "Kishu-sama, I do not wish to be rude, and you don't have to answer I you do not wish, but what are the causes for the misfortunes you have had that has made you grace us with your presence in are little home?" A short-haired blue girl named Lin, questioned.

"Oh, were to start!" Kish said half thinking out loud. So he explained, about how they had lost their powers, about the horny gays, the 'Good Will' box and why they had found him in such a _disgracing_ manner.

"Poor Kishu-sama!" Olivia said slightly hugging his arm. The other girls nodded in agreement.

"Thanks a lot. I wonder when the other two are going to wake up?" as Kish said this a door opened and the orange haired girl know as 'Ami' came into the room with five bags filled to the brim with clothing. She put it down by the bed, "I hope they are to your, and your companions liking Kishu-sama." She said bowing.

A loud crash was heard from the next room. "WHAT THE HELL AM I WEARING!? IS THIS A- A DRESS!? EWWWWW!! GIRL CLOTHES!" Tart stormed into the room where Kish and the girls were, slamming the door behind him.

"Can you keep it down!? Some people are trying to sl- Wait, **where am I**!?" Pie's voice rung from the other bedroom. A few seconds later he too was giving Kish an angry glares. "What's going on!?" They said in harmony.

"Well- ahu, I can explain! I woke up to find these girls and they said they wanted to help us, and then they carried the two of you here, and-" "Kishu it is bad grammar to use 'and' in a sentence more then once." Pie said in a mother-ish way.

"Do not correct Kishu-sama's grammar! It is fine the way it is!" Lin cried out with annoyance at the other two aliens. "Yeah, what she said!" said Kish with dignity. "Kishu-sama!?" They said in shock.

"Yes, we are here to serve Kishu-sama. At his request we have gotten you all suitable clothing to wear." A brown pig-tailed girl called Kelly said, gesturing to the bags of clothing.

"Anything is better then this dress!" Tart said crossing his arms. "But Tart-chan looks so cute!" said Ami, Pie and Kish started to chuckle. You could almost see the steam come from Tart's head.

"It's not cute! It's a _girl's_ dress!" The young alien shrieked. "But Kishu-sama told me you prefer to wear dresses because they are more comfortable to you." Ami replied holding up a blue sundress. Tart's head turned to Kish giving him a rather insane smile. "Oh, did he?"

"Yes, wasn't it so nice of him to consider you?" Rukia beamed. "Oh yes." The youngest alien replied still giving him a creepy smile as his left eye started to twitch.

"And for Pie-san I got these!" the girl's orange haired leader exclaimed holding up a rather tight shirt that would only covered cover his chest and pair of pants that were so baggy not even a belt could stop them from showing at least some of your underwear.

"Very Pie." "Defiantly." "Your own mother wouldn't recognize you." They nodded their approval at the choice of clothes.

Pie started huffing and panting, and before you know it he was on the floor rolling around.

"Inhaler! I think he's having an asthma attack!"

"Kishu-sama, Pie-sama has asthma?"

"I never thought he did. But I guess you learn something new everyday…"

"Kishu-sama is so smart."

"Thank you, **now get that inhaler!**"

"Of course, Kishu-sama!"

After finding an inhaler and Pie finally started to get his breath back he asked, "What gave you the idea to get _that_ kind of clothing." "Kishu-sama of course!" Ami said as if that any other answer in the world would be absurd.

"I will get you for this Togashi Zerodaimu Kyupura Yasha Ka Aka Tski Darogu Kishu! I, Yukiru Gohei Jin Suke Murasaki Shi Techo Majime Pie… swear it!" Pie made the oath breathing heavily partly because of his 'asthma attack' and most likely the long names.

Olivia blinked, "Wow! You're people have _really_ long names!" she said stretching out the word. "Yeah, you can imagine how hard it is to sign papers…" Kish said in a dreaded way that you knew he must be experienced. "Sounds killer." one of the girls in the kitchen remarked.

"And what did 'the great Kishu-sama' get?" Tart said wanting to see what horrifying thing could come out of that bag next.

"_Well… _Kishu-sama said he wasn't really picky and to get him whatever I thought would look good on him. Which was very hard because I think **everything **would look good on Kishu-sama, _but_ I think I found something that he will like."

Ami then pulled out some some-what torn black jeans and a dark black T-shirt that says, 'The last thing I want to do is hurt you, but its still on the list' in red gothic letters.

Kishu's eyes lit up, "I love it!" he nearly shouted. All the girls seem mutually please about this. Tart and Pie on the other hand were left with their mouths hanging open. "Guys, don't be rude! You have to be more considerate for what these girls are doing for us!" Kishu whispered harshly at the two of them.

"Go try them on Kishu-sama! I wasn't sure what size you are…" she told Kish. "I'm sure they'll be fine. And you guys can just call me 'Kish' ya'know." He replied taking the clothes and stalking off to the bathroom.

All the girls stood there silently for a moment. It was starting to scare the two other aliens. "Ki-Kish!" they all started stuttering out. Then their faces seem to shine like the Northern Lights.

"Pie, do you really think its safe to be around these girls?" Tart whispered. "Some how it just doesn't feel right. But if they DO try anything funny we're still stronger then the average human right? So we should be OK." He replied. "But what if they're spies for the Mew Mews?" Silence.

The girls had gone back to whatever they were doing before Ami had come with the clothes. They seemed to be in a never-ending bicker about Kish. What was wrong with these girls? They seemed to know every adman (not sure how you spell that, ad-um) that Kishu had in detail. And they seemed over joyed that their 'Master' had given them a new word and they continued to practice it.

When Kishu got out of the bathroom all heads seemed to turn his direction automatically. "Um… do I have something on face?" Kish finally asked totally unaware how insanely obsessed these girls were for him!

"Kishu- Kish- You look great!" Olivia dared to even try not to have his name in a sentence but failed. Kish gave her a small smile. Kish did look okay in the human clothes; better then Pie and Tart would in theirs any way. But he must have decided to keep the sunglasses cause there they were atop his head.

"You too have to go try on your clothes too." The green haired alien smirked. Other two's faces dropped even more. "Age before beauty." Tart blurted out the human expression. Pie raised an eyebrow. "That means _you_ go first."

"Is he going to have another asthma attack?" Lin questioned worriedly. "I think he'll be fine. He just is getting to excited about trying on his clothes." Kish explained. Pie stomped off to the bathroom. Several minutes latter a scream was heard, "WHAT TH- NNNNNOOOOOOOOooooooooooo!!"

"Think he's tried the clothes on yet?" Tart asked. "Some how, I think that's a yes. I just have this _feeling_…" Kish answered. "Riiiiiiiight… like the screaming really didn't give it away!" Tart said rolling his eyes.

Pie came out biting his lip and crossing his arms over himself trying to cover himself as much as possible. "Come on Pie, it can't be _that_ bad." Kish reasoned. "Ohh, but it is!" Pie stated. "We won't tell anyone if you don't." Tart said, he wasn't going to look like an idiot by himself. Finally, Pie uncrossed his arms.

Everything went quiet for a moment. A very short moment at that cause the next second Kish was on the floor laughing. "SHUT UP!" Pie yelled very red in the face. "Woah! Pie! That… _that_ is just hilarious!" Kish said before going into another laughing fit.

"It's… not… _that_ bad, Pie." Tart said weakly. "Yeah, its worse!" Kish cut in. Pie was at the reddest he had ever been in his life. He turned around not wanting to deal with anymore embarrassment.

His dark brown pants were long and probably five sizes to big, his shirt was the complete opposite. It was short, tight, and armless, black in color. Her wore a big jacket over it that was also black with graffiti looking writing on it. And to top it all off he had gangster kind of hat on. To sum it up, he looked like a really geeky guy posing as a break-dancer.

"Pie-sama, Kishu- I mean, **Kish**, isn't laughing at you, he's laughing _with_ you." Said one of the girls. Pie turned around and pointed at his face, "Does it look like I'm laughing?" A dead serious look was cemented onto his face, which only made Kish laugh more.

After a few minutes Kish stopped rolling around and started breathing deeply. 'Ahu, Okay, I'm good. Sorry, haha. Carry on with whatever you where doing." He said gesturing to continue while still lying on the floor.

"_Your_ turn Tart." Said Pie evilly. Tart was panicked, "What's with all the dark clouds in the background with the thunder and lightning? Why are you looking at me like that!? Why are you laughing maniacally!?"

"Here's your clothes, buddy." Kish said handing the bag to Tart and patting him on the back. "Oh… _that's_ why." He said dully.

"Do you think he'll be okay?" Kish asked nervously, "Should we go with him?" "He has to learn to do things by himself." Pie said gently.

About five minutes latter a small creak came from the door, and Tart stepped out. Both Pie and Kish's eyes grew the size of dinner plates.

Tart wore a…

A…

A…

Oh my god! I can't type it! He wore…

A **mini skirt**! A black and red _plaid_ mini skirt! On top he wore a red blouse with short puffy selves.

"I have a sister!" exclaimed Kish. For in fact, Tart looked a lot like a girl. A **cute**, _little_, _**frilly**_, GIRL. With his pig tails and the deep red blush on his cheeks, Kish wouldn't believe he was a boy if he hadn't seen the proof last night.

Pie was completely silent. "They altered his sex in less then five minutes! How is that possible!?" he at last burst out.

"Do I really… look like…?" he asked with little screechy voice. Which just then Kish remembered how Ichigo sometimes got and her voice to sound sort of like that (except a lot hotter in Kish's opinion). They both just nodded.

OooOooOooOooOooOooOooO

"Um, hey. Do you guys know where we maybe could get… stuff?" Kish asked Ami. She laughed at this. "Why of course Kish! The store, you buy them." she explained. "Ah, and how might one go about this, 'buying'?" he questioned.

"With money."

"That's the stuff Ichigo gets from going to that café! So I just need to go to a 'café' to get this 'money'?"

"No, not exactly. Your friend probably has a _job_ at the café and that's why she gets money."

"Ah, so I must get a 'job'?"

"Aren't you filled with questions today!" Ami said smiling.

After about an hour of many question and much explaining Kish got the basic idea in his head.

Time + work money

You could _do _**stuff **with money. You could trade it for any good imaginable, from food to doorknobs.

You could also use money to 'buy time' in a way. You could trade money for using a house for a month, a month's time.

And some how, Kish thought up a **great** plan! Pie, Tart, and himself would get these so-called 'jobs' and make lots of money so that way they could get their own house on earth with out any girls in it (except Ichigo if she ever wanted to come over). They would be able to get their own stuff. Well, at least until their powers came back.

Kish knew it wouldn't be easy, with their pale skin, oddly colored eyes, and… freakish outfits weren't exactly most humans' cup of tea, but guess what!? Kish hates tea! Unless Ichigo made it, of course.

OooOooOooOooOooOooOooO

By the time night fell, Kish had informed Pie and Tart about his great plan. Pie said he would have to ponder on the matter, and Tart just kept making sure his skirt didn't get to high up.

After dinner when it was time for everyone to go to sleep, all the girls stood in a straight line and bowed at the same time, "Good night Kishu-sama, good night Pie-san, good night Tart-chan." And then they all scattered to places unknown.

Pie and Tart went to the rooms that they had previously been sleeping in and Kish stayed in the room outside the kitchen with the mattress in it.

He lay down and said his prayers like a good little alien.

"…and please let Sinna-chan get to see the leaves like she always dreamed about, and may Seth-kun get some extra rations for his family, and…" Kish said.

Unknown to the other two, Kish did this every night since he was young. He always asked for every one of his people on his planet to be some how blessed. Though his people were few in numbers he still had to list at least two hundred names every night, but to Kish it was worth it.

"and may we take back earth for our people and Ichigo to become my bride one day." He ended his prayer. Kish then got under the covers smiling, closed his eyes, and drifted into a warm sleep.

OooOooOooOooOooOooOooO

Kish had been having the most wonderful dream. Ichigo and him had gotten locked in an ice cream parlor. They had just been sharing a scoop of Death by Chocolate when he felt someone touch him.

He bolted straight up and screamed at what he saw. The 'fan girls' had surrounded Kish on the bed. All their eyes seemed to be glowing in the dark. Had they been watching him the whole time? What were they just about to do!?

As if by answer, they started to come closer to Kish. _'What do I do!?'_ he thought terrified.

One of them giggled as she touched his hair. Then another started to pull on his hand, and before he knew it every part of his body was being clanged to or poked (except his privates, they had the decency not to touch those).

"What are you doing!?" he said in the best attempt to stay calm. For Kish it was kind of like the other night with the horny gays except they were girls and weren't trying to rip his clothes to shreds. They started giggling again and hugging him. "Pie! Tart…? Where are you guys!?" he yelled.

OooOooOooOooOooOooOooO

In a few rooms away something woke Tart up. He wasn't sure what, but when he found it he was going to destroy it bit by bit. The young alien's eyes grew big as he heard that it was Kish screaming in terror. And if Kish was screaming, it must have been something SOO dreadful, so _gruesome_, Tart would most likely fall over dead if he just glanced at whatever was out there.

Gathering his courage, Tart got out of bed and went to the door that went to Pie's bedroom. He found Pie sleeping soundly, drool coming down his face. "Pie! PIE! _Wake up!_" Tart shouted but Pie didn't so much as move. 'Was he dead?' Tart worried, had that horrible… _thing _gotten to Pie too? Tart then realized Pie was wearing earplugs…

Tart went over to the bed and started to shake his older companion awake. "X equals MC square…" Pie mumbled rolling over. Tart had to take drastic measures it seemed.

Being brave, Tart climbed onto the bed and jumped on Pie's back. "Wake up! Wake up!" he chanted. For a moment Tart thought he might be able to fly again, but then conceived that Pie had flung him across the room.

Taking his earplugs out and looking angrily at his nightgown-ed friend Pie got up. "What in Varhl's name is-" he started but then heard another one of Kish's frightened screeches. He instantly got off the bed and rushed to the door followed by the still slightly dizzy Tart.

OooOooOooOooOooOooOooO

Kish was officially freaked. The crazed fan girls had tied him to the bed some how that Kish didn't know and were now asking Kish about his feelings. It was torture! And worse of all was the laughter… their small giggles had turned into crazed cackling.

"Can you please let me go?" he asked timidly. "Don't worry Kishu-sama, we will take _good care_ of you." Said one of the girls, he wasn't sure which in the dark.

When he saw Pie and Tart he thought he was going to die of relief. "Thank goodness tour here!" he exclaimed.

"Kish what's that blue sparkly dust stuff that keeps moving around your arms and feet?" Tart asked.

"I don't know, but I can't move!" Kish replied.

The girls laughed their sick cackling that was like stuffing a bowel of sugar down your throat. "Do you like it? It is our 'Fan Girl Magic'. We have studied so we could make sure that if we ever got Kishu-sama in our grasp we could protect him." A voice that sounded like Lin's answered some where.

"Protect him? What are you doing to him?" Pie said disgustedly.

"From that girl! He is so mean to Kishu-sama, the EVIL, pink, which! We will make sure Kishu-sama never sees her again!" Olivia stated.

"What!? But I _want_ to see my Knoenko-chan again!" Kish said pitifully.

"Exactly! We must save Kishu-sama from forcing such pain on himself. You shall never leave here!"

"Guys! A little help here!?" he shouted at his to amigos.

"Amigos? What are we? Spanish or something?" Tart asked.

"It's just a synonym for friend, Tart. Now lets go!" Pie said hurriedly.

"Fan Girl Squad, attack!" their leader shouted ruthlessly.

Blue magic light balls went flying every where. They would have been easy to dodge if they had their powers, but with out them they soon had been captured.

"Any last word?" asked Ami.

Pie's lip just started quivering and then the unthinkable happened…

Pie started to _sing_.

"Marry had a little lamb,

Little lamb, little lamb,

Marry had a little lamb

Who's fleece was white as snow…"

The FGS started shrieking and screeching like harpies.

"Pie! You're a genius!" exclaimed Tart.

"I am? I mean- of course I am!" said Pie starting to get his sanity back. "But what did I do?"

"You found their weakness of course! Your singing! Sing Pie, sing like you've never singed before!"

"It's _sang _Tarto, _sang_." Pie corrected.

"Whatever." Said Tart in a way that had to remind himself yet again, even though he was wearing a nightdress didn't mean he was a girl.

"Every where that Marry went,

Marry went, Marry went,

The lamb was sure to go…"

The horrible screeching continued until the light blue magic rope like stuff that had imprisoned them had gone away from the FGS lack of concentration.

Kish jumped up relieved, "Tart, you and me grab some stuff that we'll need, Pie you keep singing." He ordered.

Totally scared Pie just listened and kept singing as the witches rolled around on the floor in pain.

Tart went into the kitchen and took out food-stuff while Kish went in the bedrooms and got some of the clothes they had been given. When they got as much stuff as they could carry both took hold of either side of Pie's arms and started dragging him towards and out the door.

Even after the apartment door had been closed, and they were standing outside on the street, Pie still mumbled the words to the song over, and over again. The whole experience seemed to have mentally deserved him.

"What now Kish? We have no where to go and Pie's gone insane." The youngest alien said worriedly.

"Well, Kish said, "I know hoe to fix at least one of those problems." And with that he set down the bag of clothes and some food he was holding and bitch slapped Pie.

"Who? What? Where- where am I!?" said Pie before his eyes were coated over with the memory of what just happened.

"So, I guess we have to start looking into those jobs." Kish said picking up the stuff and started to walk down the road, trying to make as much space between the crazed fan girls and himself. Tart and Pie soon followed into the night.

* * *

DeathStar: This's the longest chapter I think I've wrote for this story. This's where the plot REALLY starts. Lots of humor, trust me. ;3


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